Dating God's Way

There are a lot of single people in the world. Some or ok with it, and some hate being single but don't seem to be able to move from #single status. The irony is that these are all kinds of people, not just one race, one age group, one nationality or religious group of people. Christians give you all the reasons why women should wait to be found. Some even tell you to wait for your Boaz. Sounds like good advice, BUT have you ever read Ruth? Ruth actually went to Boaz and asked him to marry her! Read it for yourself.

Christians will also tell you to just pray and your husband will come. Well, maybe, but I can assure you I've been praying, and I am very single. Not very single in that nobody is pursuing me, but very single in that I have no wedding plans in the near future. So how do I change this? I'm not sure yet. I have tried dating apps. I've tried dating via social media. So far I haven't gotten anymore dates through those methods than I got with old-fashioned face to face meetings. I made a lot more girlfriends, but no men really approached me. So I began to doubt myself. I thought perhaps something was wrong with me, or that I was cursed and doomed to be single forever.
The best thing to come out of that part of the process was that I was finally honest with God. I admitted how angry I was that the one thing I thought I was supposed to do and be was a wife and mom yet here I was all these years into adulthood with neither a husband, nor kids, nor prospects. I mean I had the ugly cry, and I said a lot of stuff that I felt bad about later. BUT it was how I felt at the time. And after I said it, I did feel better. Nothing about my situation changed, but my burden felt lighter.

I admit, sometimes being single can seem like the best thing in the world while conversely being single can feel like the single worst punishment ever. It can be cool to go home to an empty house where there is peace and quiet. It can be nice to enjoy the solace in silence. But by the same token, the silence can be deafening. But being single is not being hopeless. It doesn't mean no one is interested in me or that no one loves me. In fact, I had to realize and admit that I have so many wonderful friends and family who lift my head when I forget to, and there are even a few suitors.
Even with all of that, I am not sure exactly how to move from being single to in a relationship. I don't really read about dating in the bible. And mostly people just say, don't have sex until you are married. So how does any of this work? I just know that I decided to be honest about my journey, and share in hopes of helping someone else. I also decided to take a chance and do some things differently. I approached a few guys, even asked a couple of them out. They seemed nice enough, but over time I realized they weren't for me. I was proud of myself for taking the chance; it was definitely a learning process. It wasn't that the guys didn't seem interested, they did, I just didn't want them once I got to know them. Imagine that! Here I was lying to myself saying that nobody wanted me but I was turning down people.

But I'm still waiting.
I'm hopeful though, and I am appreciative of all of the experience God blocked on my behalf. I am grateful for the opportunities to meet some awesome men, and for the lessons along the way.